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Now Mr. Rochester was becoming angry, and he looked as if he (be) about (lose) control. But I knew I still had the power (calm) him. So I took his hand and stroked it, (say), "I do love you, but there is only one thing for me (do). I must (leave) you. If I (live) with you like that, I (be) your mistress." "Jane, I want you (listen) to my story. My father loved money very much and he hated the idea (divide) the family property, so he left it all to my elder brother. I (have to) marry a rich girl. Very soon I (discover) that my bride's mother was mad and that it ran in the family. We lived for four years. She was course and stupid, and her madness also made her violent. Well, in moments of despair I intended (shoot) myself, but in the end I decided (bring) the mad woman here. Once she nearly burnt me in my bed, and the second time she visited you. She must (remind) of her own wedding day at (see) your wedding dress. I travelled all over Europe, Jane, (look) for an ideal, for a woman (love). Finally, bitter and disappointed, I returned to Thornfield on a frosty winter afternoon. And when my horse slippeed and fell on the ice, a little figure appeared and insisted (help) me. Soon I began (depend) on you for my happiness."
"Don't talk any more of the past, sir," I said, (wipe) a secret tear from my eye. "No, Jane, it was stupid of me (marry) you like that without (explain). I should (confess) everything as I do now. I promise (love) you for ever." "No, sir, it (be) wicked to do what you want. You can only (trust) in God and yourself. Live without (do) wrong, and die (hope) to go to heaven." "But you have no family (offend) (live) with me!" He was beginning (sound) desperate. I knew that what he said was true. However, in my heart I also knew I had the right (leave). He seemed (read) my thoughts. (Rush) furiously across the room, he stared fiercely into my eyes. I stared firmly back at him. He (can) (break) me in two with one hand, but he (can) not (break) my spirit. "Goodbye, my dear master!" I said. "May God (protect) you!"
That night I only slept a little, (dream) of the red room at Gateshead. The moonlight shone into my bedroom, and suddenly I saw a white figure on the ceiling (look) down at me. It seemed (whisper) to my spirit, "Daughter, leave now before you are tempted (stay)." "Mother, I will," I answered. I woke up (find) that it was still night. I wrapped up some clothes in a parcel, and crept downstairs, (fear) lest Mr. Rochester (hear) me (leave) his house. While (go) down, I (can) (hear) my master (walk) up and down and (sigh). I could (find) heaven in this room if I (want). But I stopped (reproach) myself and went miserably out of the house.
(Walk) along on the road, I could not (help) (think) of Mr. Rochester's despair at (find) himself abandoned. I hated myself for (wound) him. I wanted desperately (be) with him, (comfort) him, but somehow I made myself (keep) (walk). When I heard a coach (pass) by, I arranged
(travel) on it as far as my money (allow). Inside the coach I cried the bitterest tears of my life.
(after Charlotte Bronte)
"Jane, I want you to listen to my story. My father loved money very much and he hated the idea of dividing the family property, so he left it all to my elder brother. I had to marry a rich girl. Very soon I discovered that my bride's mother was mad and that it ran in the family. We lived for four years. She was coarse and stupid, and her madness also made her violent. Well, in moments of despair I intended to shoot myself, but in the end I decided to bring the mad woman here. Once she nearly burnt me in my bed, and the second time she visited you. She must have reminded her of her own wedding day at seeing your wedding dress. I travelled all over Europe, Jane, looking for an ideal, for a woman to love. Finally, bitter and disappointed, I returned to Thornfield on a frosty winter afternoon. And when my horse slipped and fell on the ice, a little figure appeared and insisted on helping me. Soon I began to depend on you for my happiness."
"Don't talk any more of the past, sir," I said, wiping a secret tear from my eye. "No, Jane, it was stupid of me to marry you like that without explaining. I should confess everything as I do now. I promise to love you forever." "No, sir, it would be wicked to do what you want. You can only trust in God and yourself. Live without doing wrong, and die hoping to go to heaven."
"But you have no family to offend living with me!" He was beginning to sound desperate. I knew that what he said was true. However, in my heart I also knew I had the right to leave. He seemed to read my thoughts. Rushing furiously across the room, he stared fiercely into my eyes. I stared firmly back at him. He could break me in two with one hand, but he could not break my spirit. "Goodbye, my dear master!" I said. "May God protect you!"
That night I only slept a little, dreaming of the red room at Gateshead. The moonlight shone into my bedroom, and suddenly I saw a white figure on the ceiling looking down at me. It seemed to whisper to my spirit, "Daughter, leave now before you are tempted to stay." "Mother, I will," I answered. I woke up to find that it was still night. I wrapped up some clothes in a parcel, and crept downstairs, fearing lest Mr. Rochester would hear me leaving his house. While going down, I could hear my master walking up and down and sighing. I could find heaven in this room if I wanted. But I stopped reproaching myself and went miserably out of the house.
Walking along on the road, I could not help but think of Mr. Rochester's despair at finding himself abandoned. I hated myself for wounding him. I wanted desperately to be with him, to comfort him, but somehow I made myself keep walking. When I heard a coach passing by, I arranged to travel on it as far as my money would allow. Inside the coach, I cried the bitterest tears of my life. (after Charlotte Bronte)